I recently had the experience that I am sure we all have at some point if we are in business for any length of time: a trusted source no longer feels trusted… what to do??
What I know is that the reason we choose particular people/companies to do business with is not necessarily because they are exceptional at what they do, nor do they always have the best price. We do business with them because we trust them and enjoy a real connection with them, so when that trust and connection is broken, it has a big impact on us professionally and personally.
From my recent experience, I am noticing that in both business and personal relationships, breaking of trust totally taints our image of every action, every word, and every intent — to the point that we can no longer be in relationship the same way with or do business the same way with that person.
Needing to be conscious of the tenderness of this situation has had me really thinking (and learning again). I share my main learnings below to help reinforce them for myself and to hopefully give you some food for thought (and action!):
1. It is so important to remain in BEST SELF. Staying in best self while being angry is hard to do!!! But it is also possible. I am working at this one in a big way, even though I have to confess, I am NOT always good at this!
2. It is important to get clear on our vision of what we want and not confuse our vision with our ego. UGH, another hard one!! I’m noticing again that I get really tangled up when someone feels “entitled” to something; yet at the same time, it is important to stand firm in valuing ourselves and our vision… OUCH, this is fine line again, especially when trust has been broken! It is also a fine line when money enters the scene. It has been important for me to quiet my mind and be with by BEST self (a place of love and compassion) to answer the question: “What is it that I want and need in this situation?”
3. What gets us beyond the mess of the situation is honest compassion for the other. If we can get to honest compassion, we can accomplish anything together… and if we cannot, generally the relationship moves to a different level that we hopefully get to design together, or we have to be ok to go our separate ways. If we walk away with compassion in our heart we have done our job and stayed in the path of healing. If we walk away with anger still brewing, it is our own loss (and responsibility!) to sort out with ourselves, on a usually much longer, more difficult timeframe.
UGH, the tough situations we have in business! Just know that if you are facing challenges in your own business relationships, I feel your pain…and I know that with a clear vision and honest compassion, you too can find a way forward!